Tiny Finger Point Hand With Heart pandaroma: September 2016

19 September 2016

Closer

Woah, time really flies. The camp is already 4 days ago. I think I found my future pathway through this camp. It's something I find fun and are passionate to do. Maybe that's why I felt no chemistry  when dealing with other subjects. At last I know what course I'm going to take. However, the private college fees r quite expensive for an average-income family like mine.. and yeah, they do offer us scholarships, but I'm not confident that I'll be able to do extremely well to get the scholarship. I felt really bad for myself. I also felt guilty for procrastinating all the time. My trial results are ruined by the stupid C+, the English subject. Otherwise my result will be only A's and some B's. I need 5 more mark to upgrade my English into B. Goddamnit, I think I just offended the eng teacher that she would give me this kind of mark. It is totally unacceptable. I usually got marks way higher than that. Ever since this new one replaces my old teacher, she wants us to do her works. And damn, I think I'm a victim, since I sit at the first row, my facial expressions are the major problem contributing to this damn mark. Lol I dislike english because of that old woman. Thank you very much for ruining my trial result. I so damn appreciate ur effort to decrease my mark.

And btw, it's a bless that she's not going to mark our papers in the actual exam. Otherwise, I gotta be fake as hell and treat her nicely to push up my eng marks lol, which will be my last option. I always wanna have a serious study session especially in my weak subjects. Sejarah. Nope, actually I've forgotten most of the subjects anyway. So damn get ur lazy butt off from Korean dramas. Stay away from stalking oppas! Geez I'm damn lazy. I don't know what I'm doing every day. Wasting time even though its gonna exam soon. Later I'll be regret. Yeah.
Spm final countdown:49 days. U know, the freaking 49 days! Omfgggg!! What am I still doing in my life? Quit ur bullshit activities and get ur arsehole ready for the final exam shit!! Oh shit I'm wasting my time now I know but damn there's one Korean web drama that caught my eyes starring chanyeol as the main lead!! Omg why awesome dramas keep ongoing during this peak of time???/? Haiz

I need to wake up. I need to work hard from now on. You gotta do this!!!!!! Urgh I think I'm going to have a hiatus!!! From all the bullshits, friendshits, workshits and all the form of shits!!! Lol what a usage. But I don't care anymore. I'm gonna produce the best result and I'm taking this challenge. Damn.

Don't be like me. The procrastinator who always regret for her decision.

To all the readers, don't waste ur time anymore or u 'll be like me, having the screwed up life. I wonder if anyone is gonna read this but fuck, just read it quietly xD I'm gonna start my plan now. Dream big. Don't live in a regretful life. Damn.

12 September 2016

Emotional people

What are you planning to do, dude?
Always being so butthurt
As if the whole world offends you
And that overwhelmed actions you'd taken,
Annoys the hell out of me.

Sorry,
I can't predict what you're thinking
I might be denser than you'd imagined.
However, please don't expect me to know what you're thinking
The self-proclaimed "clever" one.

You always blame for others, but never thought of your noticeable mistakes.
You emphasized their flaws, but sees none of yours.

Here's one advise for you,
Never follow your heart
Take your brain with you too
Things won't go entirely smooth like you've imagined
So stay away from my lane
Mind your own business
Dont interfere
Never comment
Offensive or butthurt words
In my space

I know,
Legend says I'm a perfectionist
I can't tolerate bullshits like this
Your attitude towards everything. Is shit.

04 September 2016

Lol

How should I say... Why am I feeling so thirst for love? It's really disgusting but damn, I'm imagining things like a normal teenage girl- crazy fantasies. Nope I'm not lovestruck, I'm not gonna admit it. But it really flutters my heart when someone , in particular, teases u, but in a sweet way. I don't know what are the hidden meaning behind that string of words. But alas, I felt overjoyed, like I had won a grand prize for the lottery when u personally talked to me. Love sucks.. I think i tend to like people who make the conversation comfortable. Comfortable silence and presence is all I need. It felt like home, secured and safe when I'm near you. Damn, I think I have a crush on that person! I don't know if that person will have the same feeling or am I just one sided. But I know, that person treats people nicely and have a lot of friends. Maybe he's just treating me nice, nothing much of the signs... let's see how things are going to be. :)